Frank Enright (39) - Prop Forward

Professional hardman and team captain Frank runs a tight ship with an iron fist which he keeps in his purse. Throughout his illustrious playing career, Frank has proudly propped for Hammersmith and Fulham 2nds, Ruislip 2nds and Sodam 4ths. He is a very ‘manly’ man and can often be seen chopping down trees, chewing tobacco and eating cow pie. He is so tough that he does not use shaving foam and refuses anaesthetic when he visits both the dentist and his mother-in-law.
Tour Names: “Cow Pie”

 

 

 

 

John Carpenter (39) - Flanker / Coach

John (aka JC) is an intimidating maverick headcoach who is not afraid to occasionally utter a swear word or tell people to help him fill up the water bottles. Within the NRFC players contract (John’s Laws 4.1, paragraph 13), John stipulates that atleast 13% of the squad must attend atleast one training session within their lifetime. He also insists that if any player is caught carrying a concealed weapon in the pre-match warm-up, he will have no option but to delegate the offender to collect the post-protectors and first aid bag after the game.

 

Wayne Meek (19) - Flanker

Wayne has a promiscuous reputation and can be easily seduced into bed (although he will refuse to take off his Middlesex Rugby jacket and remove his mouthguard.) He is an expert photographer and has sold the exclusive rights to his work to Facebook Ltd. Some of his most versatile and popular exhibitions includes ‘Me about to kick rugby ball’, ‘Me kicking rugby ball’ and ‘Me just kicked rugby ball’. Wayne constantly complains of hearing voices in his head (it’s probably his ipod.)

 

 

Chris Gregory (26) - Fly Half

Chris has been playing for the club since October 2008 - having played rugby at university and school. He formerly played for Bishopston in Bristol before moving down to London. Chris is the club’s only vegetarian.
Tour Nicknames - “Johnny Suntan”.

 

 

 

David Clifton (25) Back Row

David is a very handsome man who is currently living with his partner off Woodville Road, Haven Green, Ealing. David has been playing rugby for various clubs since eleven years of age. He openly admits that he is a fantastically gifted rugby player and could join any club he wished, but is content to play for Northolt as a favour which he would like the club to acknowledge in their 2010 ‘Honours Table’.  He is now trying his hand at social secretary. His other hand remains secured tightly around his wallet.
Tour Nicknames - “Handsome Dave”, “Corporal Big-sox”.

 

Raised by wolves, Niall has grown to appreciate the finer things in life such as Kerplunk and the waterslide at Northolt Swimmerama. 

He can often be found on treetops stealing the eggs of the jaffa-jaffa bird (not on Thursdays). He  insists that he will not play with ‘riff-raff’.

Tour Nicknames: “Bambi Raptor”, “Buttmunch”.

 

 

 

 

 

 Mark Johnson (30) Prop/Second Row

Mark joined the club back in 2007, having no previous experience of rugby but having previously played basketball, but he now seems to have found his home in rugby. His biggest love in rugby is smashing into people for fun ?!?!. Mark is the fastest forward in the club over a metre.

Tour Nicknames - “Mango”/”Disco”

 

 

 

 

 

Mango (38) - Second Row

Mango is a loving husband and devoted father to his three wonderful children. He prides himself on his wholesome ‘family man’ image, exhaustive charity work for the physically disabled and his fairplay attitude to sport. In his playing career, Mango has been sent off 19 times, sin-binned approximately 47 times and has been cited on 13 occasions for stamping. He has assaulted a total of 5 referees, one of which still bears the teeth marks on his nose. He is currently under investigation for match-fixing.

Tour Names: “Kingpin”

 

 

 

Eamonn Dunleavy (39) - Prop Forward

Eamonn has suffered with various ailments since his return from The Gulf where his fighter pilot training helped end the conflict. He is a keen philanthropist who often competes in the Great North Run to raise money for Gout UK. In 2008, he received the George Cross which ironically made George Williams very angry indeed. The medal was later returned.

 Tour Nicknames - “Big Shorts”.

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

Matthew O’Gorman (25) - Full back

Affectionately known as “our favourite” by his parents, Matthew is a keen student of the ancient art of ‘mumbling’. His incomprehensible mutterings have been commonly mistaken for traffic or a swarm of bees in the distance. When he rarely speaks, it’s just to tell the time, or to remind the coach that he is injured (again).

 Tour Name: “Mumbler”

 

 

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